I'm sitting at my desk, reflechiring (that's some Franglish for ya... reflechir + thinking = reflechiring) about how much I've changed since I've been here in Belgium. It's already been 7 months (where did all that time go?!). I know for a fact that I'm more confident than when I first arrived. I'm no longer uncomfortable asking for help when I need it. I can speak, understand, and write in a different language. I can navigate myself through buses and trains, and usually be on time. All of these things have helped me grow as a person and realize the beauty in myself and in others around me. During this year, I've also seen other exchange students change and grow. I've watched my Belgian friends mature and discover new things about the world (a few of them have even decided to embark on exchange themselves, including Amandine and Florian). Of course, there are still times when I feel down or unhappy here, and there are definitely days when I wish I could go back to my simple life in Colorado. But that's not what living is about.
I've learned that confidence can be shaky, and there are times when I think that it's all overrated -- exchange, being a teenager (if these are the "best years" of my life, I'd like a refund, thank you), eating vegetables... you know.
I've also learned something that I consider to be very important. It's okay to not want to be friends with someone. I know that in kindergarten, we learned that you have to share with everyone, and everyone is your friend. That's not true, plain and simple. And that's okay. I've met people here I don't need to be friends with in order to be happy. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Life is about being happy, yes? So why do we weigh ourselves down with relationships that will never take us anywhere? I don't necessarily have anything against any of the people I'm not friends with, and I'm not intending to bash them in any way. I'm just trying to explain that for me, personally (and you do NOT have to agree with this), being friends with tout le monde (everyone) just is not possible. And I don't want to have to alter who I am to be friends with someone. In my opinion, friendship is about complete honesty. I think it's important to say what you feel at all times, and friendship is a manifestation of that ability. I'm not saying that people should get away with being mean, I'm just saying that honesty really is the best policy.
Shout outs:
Talia Saville: Today is your birthday, ma belle. Enjoy it. I love you.
Toni Theisen: Thank you for teaching me subjunctive.
Emily Snell: For sharing skirts and random host family stories.
Hannah Mueller: For everything.
Ms. Cherek: For writing a letter of rec on super short notice -- you are the BEST!
Mr. Cain: For sending me scholarship apps so I don't forget, and for actually reading my blog.
Mrs. Linville: For teaching me that there's nothing new under the sun and for being the best English teacher I've ever had.
My mom: For filling out a billion and one forms, countless trips to school, and agonizing hours of trying to get Skype to work.
Ericson Morales: For the love of Goldfish, get your phone working again. Thank you.
Song of the Day:
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