Sometimes, it really sucks. I know, it's one of those vicious circle things. If your hair is straight, you try everything imaginable to make it curly. Those gifted in science and math wish they were better at language and social studies. For me, the big think is wanting siblings. I don't like being an only child. Sure, it has a LOT of perks, but really, it's boring. What brought this on? Right now, I'm listening to my host family in the room underneath me. They're all in there, talking to Alix (she's in Florida on exchange) via Skype. Yes, I Skype with my mom ALL the time. But it's always just her. I sometimes wish a group of people was waiting for me on the other end, the way Alix has her brothers and her parents. I'm not afraid to admit that I'm jealous of her. I'm jealous of a lot of exchange students. Heck, I'm a jealous person by nature (gotta love that Scorpio sign...).
Sigh.
Now I have the Rolling Stones song "You Can't Always Get What You Want" running through my head. My mom would always break out that line when I was little and throwing a fit about not getting my way. Yeah, I come from a special family. As insightful as that line is, I think the more important part is the second half:
You can't always get what you want/
You can't always get what you want/
But if you try sometimes/
You just might find/
You get what you need.
And I think that's applicable here. I don't have a group of siblings/aunts and uncles/grandparents/cousins waiting for me like other kids do, but I do have my mom. And she's really all I need.
Insight = win. Hang in there kiddo. You have a whole support system whether you realize it or not. And a big part of it is right here in Belgium with you! Jealous by nature, totally understand and can totally relate. But here's the thing, and people keep telling me this. To compare yourself to someone else does nothing. Because you're right. You have all you need, like you said. And anytime you doubt that, just remember that not only do you have your wonderful, loving, and caring mother back home, but you have a shoulder to lean on here and a big warm hug that is always waiting for you if you need it.
ReplyDeleteCourage, ma chérie. We're all in this together.
:)
Dearest Mikayla,
ReplyDeleteI'm your cousin; I'll be your friend :).